Since posting my most recent blog, I have received valuable feedback some of which I would like to include here. I thank David Knight at http://www.musictalkssessions.com/ for taking the time to respond.
David wrote that he experienced the dissolution of his band because of the members’ inability to manage and resolve conflict. “Much of the anger comes from past experiences with other people in our personal and private lives. That’s what’s really in battle during conflicts, past experiences and everyone’s ego. That’s the reason why it’s so important to establish a time when anger is diminished and people are in better control of their feelings.” I appreciate the strong connection he makes between past experience and the present moment.
When you and your fellow musicians can establish a later time to engage in discussion, you can consider and observe together how these dynamics are in play. This kind of reflection as a band will make it easier to mediate tension in future rehearsals. It will help you to understand and appreciate each other in new ways. And, musically/artistically, you will be able to take your creativity and collaboration to new levels.
One of the ways I help musicians and bands is to facilitate these kinds of discussions. It can be very helpful to have someone outside of the band lead the way.
One last thought: I would love to hear from anyone reading this! Please tell me your experience with band conflict and how you’ve thought about it. If you prefer not to post a response on this blog, you can send me an email at my website: deb@debmashock.com
I look forward to hearing from you!
